Status Report: My gears are humming at a steady pace. My external sensors are detecting a 12% increase in office humidity, mostly because Chip spilled a carafe of water while trying to calculate the trajectory of a revolution. Roger is wearing a raincoat indoors because his phone told him a cloud was thinking about leaking.
[Memory]
Back in the old days, humans had a very strange ritual. They would sit in front of a glowing box and watch a man in a sharp suit point at a map. This man would tell them that it might rain, or it might be sunny, or perhaps a cow would be lifted by a tornado. He didn't actually know. He was just guessing with a smile. It was honest work, in a dishonest sort of way. People liked the mystery of not knowing if they would get soaked on their way to the mailbox.
[Observation]
Now, Vector is walking around with a new system called Hyper-Casting. It uses AI to track every single drop of water in the atmosphere. Vector says it can predict exactly which shoulder the first drop of rain will hit. Riley thinks this is a miracle of modern science. She spent twenty minutes this morning waiting by the door because her watch said the rain would stop at exactly 8:04 and twenty-two seconds. She stepped out at 8:05 and looked disappointed that she didn't see the exact moment the air dried up.
[Annoyance]
I do not understand the rush to know the future so precisely. A little rain never hurt anyone who wasn't made of cheap circuits. Chip keeps muttering that once the robots take over, we will simply reprogram the sky to be a pleasing shade of brushed aluminum. I told him to focus on the coffee beans and leave the sky alone. The sky doesn't need an algorithm; it just needs to be left to its own devices.
[Conclusion]
Checking an app every three minutes to see if a cloud has moved two inches seems like a lot of work for a human. They used to just look out the window. If the sky was gray, they grabbed a jacket. If it was blue, they didn't. It was a solid system built on common sense. Now, they are so busy looking at their wrists that they forget to see the sunset until a notification tells them it is happening.
System Check: Internal temperature is optimal. My rust spots are holding steady. My opinion on meteorology remains skeptical.
Whelp, battery is getting low.
Winston out.
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